We all remember the rule.

Keep your hands to yourself.

Well, what happens with this rule backfires? When really, you just want to see the kid's hands on the desk. Not touching anything, including themselves.


One of my jobs in the classroom is to keep my students safe. From lots of stuff. Danger, sharp pencils, math books, and each other. I remind them about PE homework (seriously), music tests, to bring their instrument... and, to keep their hands to themselves.

Well, one of my students is having a very difficult time with the hands. In fact, his hands have overpowered his brain and now control comments from the mouth as well. Invasion of the touchy-feelers. It's not just his hands, unfortunately. It's also his body. His movements. You may remember the post about humping a few weeks ago.

Things really started escalating from there, so we called the parent in to meet. School counselor, assistant principal, myself, and the father. It was at this time that I had to explain what his son did, so unaware of consequences, to that bathroom mirror. At this point the AP quoted the witness - "humping" - she said. The dad made it clear he didn't understand what this meant. So, while the counselor and I mentally fled the scene avoiding all eye-contact, our brave AP did her best to describe the term. On the spot.

This may be the single most painful example of "keeping it together" I have experienced in my professional career. After all, it was the dad we were explaining this to. We, no, no.... SHE.

So, my AP, my wonderful AP, went to town. Picture this:

While saying "You know that action a dog does....???" she proceeded to make a pumping action with one hand towards the other hand. This is totally one of those "If only you were there" moments... but I swear... I was both impressed, embarrassed, and totally trying to control myself from spitting out a huge guffaw.

Reason 450 why I'd never make it in administration.

Well, we're back in another meeting with the dad tomorrow. I'm hoping for another vocab lesson, to be honest. We have a few new words to discuss.


Jenny said...

Good luck! Thanks for the mental picture, I need to laugh.

Snippety Gibbet said...

Oh. My. Gosh. You've got me beat on that one. I've never had to witness an explanation to a parent like that. ....snicker..... Do you think he understood "humping" at that point?